On this page you will find some advice about what to do if you are being stalked, or think you may be being stalked, or are worried about someone else’s obsessive or controlling behaviour.
Are you a victim of stalking?
Some of the things stalkers do:*
- Hang around outside your home or workplace
- Call at your home or workplace
- Send or leave materials or unwanted gifts
- Send unwanted letters, messages, texts and e-mails
- Continue to contact you after you have told them not to
- Contact your friends, family or work colleagues
- Repeatedly mention you directly or indirectly in social media posts
- Follow you and show up wherever you go
- Spy on you and track your movements
- Monitor you on-line
- Monitor your phone
- Hack into your social media
- Threaten to kill themselves because they can't live without you
- Make up stories to damage your reputation
- Make false complaints to agencies
- Spread harmful rumours about you
- Threaten to disclose private sexual photographs
- Break into your home and interfere with or damage your property
- Physically assault or threaten you or those close to you, including pets
If one or more of these things have happened, then you may be a victim of stalking.
Stalkers are controlling, fixated, and obsessive.
Stalkers are not only distressing—they can be dangerous!
GET HELP NOW!
What to do
If you are being stalked, or think you may be being stalked, or you are worried about someone's obsessive or controlling behaviour
First and foremost, call 101 to contact the police. Stalking is a crime: every force has specialists who can advise you and take appropriate action if needed.
Advice over the phone
- The best thing is to phone the Suzy Lamplugh Trust's National Stalking Helpline: 0808 802 0300.† They are open weekdays between 09:30 and 16:00, except Wednesdays when they open at 13:00.
The main thing to know is that you won’t necessarily find the best advice by googling “stalking”. We recommend the following web pages:
- Paladin’s advice for victims.
- Leicestershire police’s advice and information on stalking.
- Women's Aid and the Suzy Lamplugh Trust also have useful on-line resources on stalking and domestic abuse.
- The Stalking Risk Profile website, although aimed primarily at professionals working with victims or perpetrators of stalking, contains good general information on what stalking is, types of stalking, etc., as well as providing some really helpful general advice for victims.
If you have done some of these things yourself, or know someone who has
If you have done some of these things, you may already be committing the offence of stalking and YOU NEED TO STOP NOW! Stalking is an obsession and it is illegal—you can face a prison sentence of up to 10 years.
- You may find it helpful to contact Respect, who can provide help to those offenders who recognise that they have a problem. The number is 0808 802 4040† and the line is open Monday–Friday between 09:00 and 17:00.
If you think you might have been hacked
* This is based upon the Trust’s “Are you a victim of stalking?” leaflet which we distribute at meetings and public events. We gratefully acknowledge suggestions and advice from collaborators in the National Stalking Consortium, police and CPS.
† Calls to 0808 80 numbers are free to call from landlines and mobile phones within the UK and do not appear on itemised bills.
Please note that the Alice Ruggles Trust does not provide first-hand advice or advocacy in individual cases; other charities, as listed above, exist for this.